


The One for Me is You

by squiddtastic



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M, Soul Mate AU, just putting that out there, lots of sads(tm), this is a very angsty soul mate au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-12-01 04:37:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11478744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squiddtastic/pseuds/squiddtastic
Summary: Josh had a date tattooed on his hip for as long as he could remember. He didn't know where it came from, but he knew everyone had it on some part of their body. He knew it was about his soul mate. What he didn't know, however, was what it meant. He knew it had some significance with the one he was destined to be with, but what? Was it the day they met? Was it their first kiss? Was it their wedding day?He didn't know. It killed him.(spoiler: it's not a happy date)





	The One for Me is You

**Author's Note:**

> uhm i started writing this on april 17, 2016 and just finished it today so i continued writing after over a year long hiatus NICE  
> i'm not as big into ToP as i was back then but they're still my favourite band so i decided to finish it!!  
> enjoy (warning sadness up ahead)

Josh had a date tattooed on his hip for as long as he could remember. He didn't know where it came from, but he knew everyone had it on some part of their body. He knew it was about his soul mate. What he didn't know, however, was what it meant. He knew it had some significance with the one he was destined to be with, but what? Was it the day they met? Was it their first kiss? Was it their wedding day?

He didn't know. It killed him.

He wanted to ask someone about it - a friend, a family member - but he was admittedly a bit too embarrassed to ask anyone. Nobody really shared the date on their body, nobody talked about it. He assumed he could just figure it out when the date was nearing, but that day wasn't today. The date on his hip read "05.18.16", he had quite a bit of time. It was currently January of 2011.

But even through all of his self reassurance it still bothered him to no end.

He tried to forget about it. Later in the year, he was invited to his friend Chris' band performance. Chris said he had been 'acting kind of tense recently,' and he had wanted to show off the band to him anyways. Josh didn't need that much convincing to agree.

The show surprised him. The music was so...different. It was indescribable, really. He hadn't heard anything like it. And he loved it. The abnormality of it intrigued him and he found himself bobbing his head to the beat more than once. Something other than the beat caught his attention while he was there, though, and that was the lead singer. He heard a bit about him before. Tyler? Yeah, that's what it was. Chris talked about him sometimes. Josh found himself staring intently at the guy throughout the whole show. He didn't know why.

They all met up after the show; Chris was definitely eager to hear Josh's thoughts.

"Josh!" Called Chris. Josh looked over, smiling when he saw Chris running towards him.

"Hey," he replied, waving. Chris stopped running once he reached him.

"So? What'd you think?" He asked eagerly. Josh just laughed.

"It was amazing. How do you even come up with that kind of stuff?" He asked, genuinely bewildered. "I've never heard anything like that before."

"Well, I didn't write them, but I appreciate it," Chris grinned. "Tyler wrote them. The singer, I mean. But I assumed you knew that already." Josh nodded. "Hey, come on, I'll introduce you. He'd like to hear what you just said. He gets a little embarrassed, though." Josh just laughed and agreed to meet the singer. He actually really wanted to meet him. But he kept his excitement at bay. He didn't need to be teased, like he knew he would.

Chris lead him through some crowds of people and to the area where the band was hanging out. More specifically, where Tyler was hanging out. The man was standing, leaning on a wall with his eyes on his phone. He had a water bottle in his other hand. The sight of him caused Josh to smile.

"Hey, Tyler," the man looked up from his phone, eyes drifting to Josh. Josh couldn't help but feel a little nervous, like he had to make a good first impression. "This is Josh. He really liked the show."

Tyler gave him a little smile that Josh found really adorable. "Oh, thank you," he replied.

"Yeah," Josh began. "The songs are really unique. I heard you wrote them? They're amazing." The drummer grinned when Tyler lowered his head a bit, a blush spread across his face. Yeah, he did get embarrassed. But it was okay.

"I did," Tyler replied a bit sheepishly.

"How'd you come up with that stuff?"

Tyler looked up at him again and smiled.

Tyler and Josh definitely clicked after that. They talked for a long time. Josh got his number.

Later on, Josh was in the band.

Josh was happy.

Josh and Tyler were a 2 person band for years after that day and Josh never regretted joining it. He hadn't even thought of regretting it. It was probably the best decision he had ever met in his life. Tyler brought so much happiness to his life, and in all honesty it confused the hell out of him. Every time Tyler smiled at him, talked to him, looked at him, his heart fluttered. Why? He asked himself that every day. He lay in bed at night thinking about it. Eventually he decided to ignore it; it meant nothing, right? However that was easier said than done. Just being around Tyler made him unable to control the thoughts creeping into his mind.

Okay. Whatever.

In 2013 he met a girl. An extremely beautiful girl. Her name was Debby and he was certain he was in love with her. God, he loved her so much. She was sweet and caring, so many people loved to be around her. She was charming and down to earth, Josh couldn't believe he was lucky enough to meet her. Every time she smiled at him, talked to him, looked at him, his heart fluttered.

...Wait.

He shook his head. No, he had to stop thinking like that. It was getting on his nerves. He just wanted to be normal, live a normal life with a girl he was in love with. He was certain she was his soul mate, but the date was still so far. When he had asked her to be his girlfriend she accepted immediately and he felt he couldn't be happier.

The fans loved them together, their families loved them together, everyone loved them together. Tyler didn't seem to mind all the much either. But, you know, it wasn't like Tyler would care or anything right? There was no reason for Tyler to care at all. They weren't...Wait, what? Josh had really been annoying himself with his own mind recently and he hated it. He just wanted to enjoy himself for once without worrying about...him.

Josh and Debby were sitting in the moving van, fingers interlocked with each other as Debby's head rested on Josh's shoulder. Tyler was on the other side of the seat, chin resting on his hand which was propped against the door. He stared out the window and didn't give the couple a single glance. This bothered Josh. A lot. 

Once the road trip was over and they arrived at their hotel, Josh stopped Tyler before he could retreat to his room.

"Ty," he began, a hand on Tyler's shoulder as he prevented him from walking. Tyler looked over his shoulder at Josh, a questioning look on his face. "What's wrong, man? The whole time in the car you wouldn't even look at me."

Tyler just smiled, what looked like a forced smile, and shook his head. "Nothings wrong, I'm just tired. We've been on the road all day. Don't worry about me, Jish." And with that, the younger man walked to his room and closed his door until the sun rose again.

Josh almost didn't want to share a room with Debby that night.

Their trip went on normally. Everything seemed to be okay, except for the little things that Tyler did like the one night in the van. He was very distant and quiet, but he refused to tell Josh what was wrong. Josh didn't want to push it. He did want to talk about it, though, so he talked about it to the one other person he felt he could trust with this.

"Hey, Deb?" Josh started, fingers interlocked with his girlfriends as they sat on a couch together watching some corny movie that neither of them really cared about.

"Yeah?" She asked, a sleepy tone to her voice. 

"Do you think Tyler's okay? He hasn't been the same. Have you noticed that?"

Silence.

"Josh, don't worry about Tyler. I'm sure he's fine," she reassured him softly, seeming to be at least a little bit more awake. "If something's wrong he'll just write it in a song. You know how he is." Josh hesitated before sighing. 

It was silent for a bit after that.

"Hey."

"Yes?"

"...That rhymed."

Debby just laughed and softly punched him in the arm, flashing him a real and genuine smile. Josh returned it.

"I love you," he said.

"I love you more," she said. He laughed.

She was definitely his soul mate.

...

They broke up a few months later.

This was one of the most soul crushing things that could have happened to Josh. He was so positive, so sure of himself that he had found his soul mate. He told everyone that he had found the one a few years early, but he supposed he was wrong. And it felt like his heart couldn't be shattered any more than it was.

Josh was lying in bed for hours, alone, refusing to talk to most people who walked in. Mark came in first, attempting to get him to go outside and actually do something, considering he had been in there for a couple of days straight. Of course, Josh refused. He refused every time Mark offered anything to him and in a way he felt bad but his mental state felt worse and because of it he didn't care. Ben visited him a few times too, offering to take him on a road trip or something, anything else that didn't involve him laying in bed and moping for days straight. He, again, politely declined. People around him were becoming frustrated. He didn't blame them.

And then Tyler came in.

Surprisingly, Tyler was one of the last people to try to talk to him. Which would have surprised Josh if he had been really paying attention. He heard the door to his room open and instinctively let out a small sigh as he buried his face in his pillow. He knew whoever it was was just going to try and force him to go out again but he didn't want to and he wouldn't and he knew that. He was surprised, though, when he felt the weight of his bed shift, indicating someone else had layed down on it. What? He carefully lifted his head and looked over to where the weight came from, only to be greeted with Tyler's face that was way too close to his. His breath hitched and Tyler, upon realizing how close he really was, scooted back and flashed a small, sad, and awkward smile. Josh tried to return it but he couldn't.

"Hi Jishwa," Tyler spoke quietly, softly. It was very comforting to Josh.

"Hi."

The singer's smile only grew sadder at the simple reply. Josh felt horrible about it.

"I know losing her was hard, but you can get through this, alright?" he continued. "You don't need her to be happy. You didn't before and I know you don't now. You got me, right? You can do this, Josh. I believe in you."

Those last four words are what made Josh finally smile.

God, Josh loved him.

His best friend...

"...I love you, Ty," Josh finally spoke up. Tyler looked shocked for a second before coming to terms with what he said. Again, he smiled.

"I love you, too. Now, let's get some ice cream. Alright?"

And Josh finally got out of bed.  
\--  
Ever since that day Josh had been even more confused about himself. He hadn't even meant to say he loved Tyler, the words just slipped out. And when Tyler repeated them back he could have passed out. But why? He loved his best friend in the world and his best friend in the world loved him back. Why did it have such a big affect on him?

He had no idea, but now every small thing Tyler did caught his attention. The way he'd do a little dance when he was brushing his teeth, the way he'd bite the inside of his cheek when he was frustrated with something, the way he'd quietly hum their songs while getting lost at the scenery outside of a window. He never noticed it before, but now Josh was paying a lot more attention to him.

Why?

Another thing that had been bothering him a lot lately was his tattoo. Specifically the mystery tattoo on his hip. He had been way too embarrassed to ask anyone before but now he was finally getting the courage to do so. That and his curiosity was killing him way too much to just let it slide. So, he went to Mark.

"Mark," Josh stopped the man before he could leave the otherwise empty tour bus. He turned around and looked at Josh questioningly.

"What's up?"

Josh cleared his throat. This shouldn't be hard at all, it's just a tattoo. Why was he having trouble asking what it meant? "Okay, this has been bothering me for a really long time now. What do the tattoos mean?" He knew he wouldn't have to specify what he meant. Everybody had the tattoo. When he mentioned it, however, Mark's expression changed from questioning to...regret? No... He didn't really know what it was, but he looked more upset and conflicted.

"...Uh, yeah. You know what? I'm going to wait on telling you that. Okay?" Josh felt himself emotionally deflate. He had spent all this time gaining the courage to ask and this was what he got? "What's your date?"

"May 18, 2016. What's yours?"

Mark just smiled. But Josh could tell it wasn't a happy smile. "February 5, 2010."

It had already passed. That meant Mark knew what it was. This raised another question from Josh, though. "Where is it? Your tattoo, I mean."

Mark shrugged lightly and looked down at his forearm. "It used to be on my arm, but after the event takes place the tattoo disappears. It's weird. You can choose to get it redone, but...Most people don't."

God, it seemed to be killing Josh even more now. Right as he was about to beg for him to tell him, Mark spoke up again.

"You still have a couple years left. I promise when it gets closer I'll tell you, okay?"

It wasn't really. But Josh had to agree.  
\--  
Every night he had to convince himself that he wasn't in love with his best friend. Every night was a constant battle, playing off his weird emotions like they were nothing and coming up with excuses for every one. It was totally impossible. It was totally unreal. It wasn't real. It just wasn't.

So why did he have to convince himself of that every night?

He shook his head. No, it wasn't right. And he came up with more excuses each time, each one seeming less believable than the last but he believed them anyway.

He'd meet his soul mate soon, he just hasn't yet. He has to be patient.

Every show felt like a blessing to Josh. He sat near the back of the stage, pounding at his drums with full force while his best friend in the world sang for a crowd full of broken people. It mesmerized him. He found himself stumbling with his drum sticks as he got distracted watching Tyler sing. The best part was when he'd play his ukulele right in front of the drum set, right in front of Josh. Josh loved that.

But the best thing of all was when Tyler would play alone. No drums, no computers, just Tyler and his piano. Josh could just sit back and watch, listen, in some sort of trance as he heard Tyler's voice. That was the best, and it rarely happened. But when it did, Josh savored it as much as he could before the moment ended. Those were the best.

Why was he so obsessed with his best friend?

Best friend...

After every show, when Tyler and Josh were alone in the tour bus, Josh liked to give Tyler a giant and, what he assumed was probably very constricting, hug. Tyler didn't seem to mind. When Josh first started doing this Tyler was confused and a little worried that Josh wasn't feeling okay, but realized it was just a friendly thing Josh liked to do and started to accept it. He even started to hug Josh back. Josh relished in the feeling that Tyler hugs brought. 

Everything Tyler did just attracted Josh.

Wait, what?

Josh found himself constantly trying to be as close to Tyler as he could. During interviews he would sit right next to him and would be very upset if they were separated. He would always choose a bunk right on top or below Tyler's in the tour bus. Sometimes, if he was feeling daring, or just really upset, he'd ask Tyler to cuddle with him until he fell asleep. Tyler always agreed, especially when he was feeling anxious or sad. Josh was extremely grateful. In hotels they always shared a room, now that Josh didn't have a significant other who he would have to stay with. Why did Josh seem to prefer it this way?

And why did Tyler also seem to prefer it this way? 

Josh constantly had to mentally slap himself. He'd find his soul mate. Tyler wasn't his soul mate. He couldn't be.

March 26, 2015. Mark still wouldn't tell Josh about the tattoo. He told him he'd have to wait longer than what he had. Josh was upset but let it go.

August 14, 2015. Mark still refused to give any information. Josh was beginning to become more frustrated. His feelings for Tyler were growing but he knew that Tyler was not his soul mate. This was just a stupid thing that would eventually pass. Just a stupid thing that had been going on since they met. It wasn't a big deal.

February 3, 2016. The date was nearing. It seemed like tomorrow for Josh, but it also felt like next year. Again, he asked Mark about the tattoo. Mark continued to refuse. Josh was very frustrated.

"Mark, please, come on, man. I'm begging you here," Josh pleaded with him. Mark just bit his lip and shook his head.

"Josh, trust me. When you find out you'll know why I couldn't tell you. I'll tell you sometime in May, okay?"

Josh just wanted to fall over and scream.

The months leading up to May were complete torture. His cuddly and close-to-Tyler routines were even more frequent. Why? Why why why? Josh felt like he couldn't get close enough to Tyler and it teared him up inside. He wanted to scream and cry.

Why?

But then, it was May. May 17. Tomorrow was Josh's date and he was beyond nervous. He had no idea what to expect since Mark had been hiding it this whole time. And the worst part of it all was that Mark still, a day before the date, refused to tell Josh what was going to happen.

"Mark, you're killing me here," Josh complained. Inside, however, he was shaking like a leaf and he couldn't calm down his nerves. He didn't know what was going to happen and, yes, it was killing him. He had to know.

"Josh, please. I don't want to tell you," Mark hesitated. Josh groaned.

"You promised," he whined and looked at Mark with hopeful eyes. Mark's eyebrows furrowed as he tried to resist before he sighed in defeat.

"Okay, okay. But...well, I don't know who your soul mate is and it looks like you don't either. So this might not affect you as much as it did me. Are you sure you want to hear it?" 

Josh couldn't have nodded any quicker. Maybe this is how he would find his soul mate.

Mark just bit his cheek and nodded. "Well...the date is the day your soul mate....uh, passes away..." It was silent after that. Josh didn't know how to respond. Mark looked like he wanted to burst into tears. "Look, this isn't what you were expecting and I'm sorry. I wish it was something happier, I wish it was something better but it isn't. If I could change it don't you think I would?" He swallowed and turned away from the drummer. "I'm, uh, going to get something to drink, I guess. I'll see you later."

Josh was left alone with his thoughts.

Tomorrow was the day his soul mate would pass away.

Maybe it was a good thing he hadn't met them yet...

...Right?  
\--  
It was May 18, 2016. 

Josh was extremely anxious. He kept a close eye on Tyler. Why? Tyler wasn't his soul mate. But...he had to make sure. He had to make sure nothing happened to him. He crossed every street with Tyler, he opened every door for Tyler, he even made sure Tyler's food wasn't too hot when he ate it.

"Dude, are you okay?" Tyler asked Josh as the drummer checked the temperature of his food. Again. "You're being really weird today. Like, even weirder than normal. Did you know I can eat by myself?"

Josh just flashed him a fake smile. "I'm fine! Just a little nervous. I want to make sure my baby boy here's alright before the show." Tyler just grinned and then laughed, seeming to go along with it. Josh smiled. He loved making Tyler laugh. It was the best feeling.

He was nervous about the show, though. Just...not for any reason Tyler would be thinking.

Anyone who knows anything about twenty one pilots concerts knows how much jumping and climbing goes on. A lot. And normally it wouldn't be a big deal to Josh, but today it was the most nerve wracking thing he'd ever thought about.

"Oh, and uh, Tyler?" Josh began. Tyler looked at him and tilted his head a bit. God, Josh loved that. "Uhm, do you think that maybe you could...not climb anything today? Or jump off the piano? Or crowd walk?" Tyler almost burst out laughing until he realized Josh was serious.

"What? Are you kidding me? What kind of twenty one pilots concert is that?" He asked, bewildered at his friends request. Josh's stomach fell. "I have to, Josh. And this is a hometown concert, too. Do you honestly expect us to not do anything?"

Josh let out a nervous laugh and rubbed the back of his neck. "Ah, I guess not. Yeah, I don't even know what I'm saying. Forget I said anything."

He should have been more convincing. He hated himself for that.

Before he knew it, it was only a matter of minutes before they were on.

It was the first time in his life where he did not want to.

But why was he worried? Tyler wasn't his soul mate.

...

He heard the beginning of Heavy Dirty Soul. He had to go on stage. It was time for the most terrifying show he had ever experienced in his life.

Everything inside Josh was numb, yet flaring with anxiety. His emotions were conflicted, he was lost in his thoughts. His performance was less than up to his normal standard but he couldn't take his eyes off of Tyler. His best friend. His best friend.

That's all he was. Stop being so nervous. His stomach was doing somersalts and he let his nervous energy out into his drums. They were loud, overall messy, and his head was spinning, spinning, spinning, as he watched Tyler jump around the piano on the stage. So far so good. However he didn't think this day could have a happy ending no matter what happened.

He could faintly hear words coming from Tyler's mouth and only started paying attention when the man in question looked back at him. Josh smiled, not knowing if he said anything, and Tyler simply smiled back before turning towards the crowd once again. They were all screaming, jumping, yelling out to them, but they had no idea what could happen today. None of them did. Josh was alone.

Car radio. He could hear the piano as Tyler's hands danced across the delicate keys, indicating the beginning of the song. Josh was so, so nervous, he didn't know if he'd be able to play at all. He knew Tyler had big plans for this song; he was going to climb the structure of the stage, and it was high. Much too high for Josh to feel comfortable with. He felt like he was going to be sick.

He was drumming hard. Tyler sung. He was drumming hard. Tyler danced. He was drumming hard. Tyler approached the stage structure. He was drumming so much harder.

Josh's heart was threatening to burst as he watched Tyler begin to climb the stage. The structure wobbled, only slightly, but enough to make Josh's rhythm stumble. Tyler didn't look worried. Stupid, stupid Tyler. Josh wanted to scream, climb up the structure and grab Tyler himself but he knew he couldn't do that. He knew it. Why did he even let him do it in the first place? Stupid, stupid Josh.

Then, he was at the top. Tyler made it. He was so far up Josh had to stretch his neck to see him and he wanted the entire stadium to stop moving. Any movement could cause it to tip over - at least, that's how Josh felt. He felt as if he were a child in a plane and one person standing up would tip the entire thing. He hated it. He wasn't a child anymore. But God did he feel like one. He was just waiting, his stomach doing flips, watching Tyler intently. Something was going to happen. Something was going to happen.

...But nothing happened.

Before he knew it Tyler had finished. He was done, and he was alive. The structure hadn't tipped and everything was fine, the crowd was cheering and Tyler look so, so happy as he stood above everyone. So was Josh, of course. His best friend was alive! But...

God, Josh couldn't keep denying it to himself anymore. He was in love with his best friend, but his best friend was not his soul mate. Josh bit his lip as he felt tears forming. He had finally admitted it to himself, in front of thousands of people, and none of them knew a thing. This wasn't destined to be, and now Josh had to get over it.

But of course he was happy. God, he was happy. Tyler was alive, and if that meant they weren't soul mates then Josh could handle that. He could handle that one thousand times over. Now he could get over it and he could be happy. They could both be happy. Now he knew for sure, and his tears of sadness turned into tears of joy. He felt as if a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders in two different ways. Now he just couldn't wait to get home and sleep peacefully for the first time in months.

But then, he heard screams.

Not cheers, screams. Screams of terror. Screams of dread. He heard a horrible creaking, the floor was shaking.

Josh's heart stopped.

The stage structure was falling. And Tyler was only just climbing down.

Josh wanted to stand. He wanted to run, grab the structure and pull it back up with any superhuman strength he knew he didn't have. But he simply sat there, staring in disbelief as if this were a scene from a movie. He felt as though he were underwater, drowning, unable to breathe or hear correctly as time seemed to slow down and stop. He could see Tyler smiling at him in his minds eye, hear his bright laughter and see his silly dances in the tour bus. The time they play happy wheels together. Their interviews, their performances, their experiences, their entire friendship.

And when that structure finally crashed to the ground and shattered, so did Josh.

His tattoo was gone.

His soul mate was dead.


End file.
